Office Hours (Jess Willard/Sydney Reid)

[Jess Willard]

[Counselor's Office]

Jess had once been told that the life of a counselor on a Starfleet ship could be frustrating because crew members would regularly resist getting counseling. She now realized that the person who said that was a dirty filthy liar if the Discovery's crew was indicative of anything. She at least managed to schedule a lunch this time...for once. She was on the final appointment of the day so she made her way over to the chair on the far side of the room as the door chime chirped. "Come in." She called out as she took her seat.

[Sydney Reid]

[USS Discovery-B | Deck 9 | Counselor's Office]

Sydney was not pleased to be having her time taken up by such things but had come to understand they were a necessity given her position, and more importantly her required security clearances, aboard the Discovery. She'd never met anyone that actually enjoyed regular mandatory psychological evaluations, but it was the nature of the job and something she'd had to do more times than she could remember. Her Dad had mentioned before it wouldn't be unwise to seek some counseling, but the woman had never felt it personally necessary.

Arriving at the Counselor's Office door, Sydney took in a deep breath in preparation before exhaling it to reach out and press the button for the chime. The counselor's response was slightly muffled as it came through as the doors whooshed open. Laying her eyes on the woman as she took her seat behind her desk, the cryptologist was momentarily surprised by the unique look of the woman before stepping in to start her travel over the relatively short but seemingly distant expanse toward the open chair opposite the medical officer.

"Hi," Sydney called out brightly as the doors whoosed closed behind her. She was sure she heard the doors' lock engaging, causing her natural stride to gain a singular, slight hitch, but she chose to ignore it as she continued on. Coming to a halt just to the side of the chair across from Ensign Willard, the Ops Ensign offered a hand in greeting, matched with a slightly feigned smile, "Ensign Sydney Reid. I'm here for my mandatory security clearance psychological evaluation as scheduled, Sir." Unsure how exactly to address the woman who wore the same rank as her, she'd gone with the customary one used for officers aboard a Starfleet vessel.

Sydney didn't take the seat until it was offered or she was directed to, but as she did, it was clear she was finding this whole situation somewhat uncomfortable. Taking the seat in a rigid, almost formal posture, her hands came to rest on her thighs but slid back and forth slightly, as if self-soothing. She didn't mean to be nervous but was well aware of how important this evaluation was, especially in regard to her specialized assignment on the ship and the future of her career in Starfleet.

[Jess Willard]

[USS Discovery-B | Deck 9 | Counselor's Office]

Sydney was not pleased to be having her time taken up by such things but had come to understand they were a necessity given her position, and more importantly her required security clearances, aboard the Discovery. She'd never met anyone that actually enjoyed regular mandatory psychological evaluations, but it was the nature of the job and something she'd had to do more times than she could remember. Her Dad had mentioned before it wouldn't be unwise to seek some counseling, but the woman had never felt it personally necessary.

Arriving at the Counselor's Office door, Sydney took in a deep breath in preparation before exhaling it to reach out and press the button for the chime. The counselor's response was slightly muffled as it came through as the doors whooshed open. Laying her eyes on the woman as she took her seat behind her desk, the cryptologist was momentarily surprised by the unique look of the woman before stepping in to start her travel over the relatively short but seemingly distant expanse toward the open chair opposite the medical officer.

"Hi," Sydney called out brightly as the doors whoosed closed behind her. She was sure she heard the doors' lock engaging, causing her natural stride to gain a singular, slight hitch, but she chose to ignore it as she continued on. Coming to a halt just to the side of the chair across from Ensign Willard, the Ops Ensign offered a hand in greeting, matched with a slightly feigned smile, "Ensign Sydney Reid. I'm here for my mandatory security clearance psychological evaluation as scheduled, Sir." Unsure how exactly to address the woman who wore the same rank as her, she'd gone with the customary one used for officers aboard a Starfleet vessel.

Sydney didn't take the seat until it was offered or she was directed to, but as she did, it was clear she was finding this whole situation somewhat uncomfortable. Taking the seat in a rigid, almost formal posture, her hands came to rest on her thighs but slid back and forth slightly, as if self-soothing. She didn't mean to be nervous but was well aware of how important this evaluation was, especially in regard to her specialized assignment on the ship and the future of her career in Starfleet.

[Councelor's Office]

Jess eyes followed the path Sydney took to her seat and kept an eye on her posture. Her eyebrows raised slightly and her smile grew. Quietly she relaxed her posture and listened to Sydney speak. "Sir huh?" She called out ryely. "Please. Just Jess. Or counselor, doc, basically anything other than sir. I'm not your superior. Just a counselor." She nodded slightly before continuing. "Don't worry about protocol in here. Trust me, the secret will be safe with me." She added with a slight wink.

The counselor sat for a moment and made a slight motion to the replicator. "Is there anything I can get you? Coffee, tea, cookies?"

[Sydney Reid]

[USS Discovery-B | Deck 9 | Counselor's Office]

Jess' eyes followed the path Sydney took to her seat and kept an eye on her posture. Her eyebrows raised slightly and her smile grew. Quietly she relaxed her posture and listened to Sydney speak. "Sir huh?" She called out ryely. "Please. Just Jess. Or counselor, doc, basically anything other than sir. I'm not your superior. Just a counselor." She nodded slightly before continuing. "Don't worry about protocol in here. Trust me, the secret will be safe with me." She added with a slight wink.

The counselor sat for a moment and made a slight motion to the replicator. "Is there anything I can get you? Coffee, tea, cookies?"

"Sorry, Sir"¦Jess," Sydney tried to quickly correct, but even then found her nerves defaulting her to practiced behavior. She was trying to relax, especially given she'd gone through these before, but each counselor was different, and this counselor certainly held more sway than any other when it came to the ship. Jess was already proving to treat it all as much more relaxed than previous experience, inviting a bit of much-needed playfulness to what was normally seen as a very professional and clinical event.

Glancing over at the replicator at Jess' offer, Sydney seemed to ponder for only a moment before turning her attention back to the counselor to answer, "No, thank you. I'm good for now, but I'll let you know if I change my mind." It was a concession she'd not made during her previous interview with the Discovery's XO, but already she was feeling like this was one of those situations where she needed to show a more relaxed stance if she wanted it to go well.

Unsure how to start as she stared at the other woman, Sydney once again slightly rubbed her thighs before asking, "So, how do you do this? Should I just start talking, or"¦was there questions you are supposed to ask?" The Ops Ensign was certainly trying to get things started, but seemingly only to make this evaluation go as quickly as possible, including answering all of the questions in whatever she believed was the correct thing to say to ensure a passing grade from the counselor.

[Jess Willard]

[USS Discovery-B | Deck 9 | Counselor's Office]

"Sorry, Sir"¦Jess," Sydney tried to quickly correct, but even then found her nerves defaulting her to practiced behavior. She was trying to relax, especially given she'd gone through these before, but each counselor was different, and this counselor certainly held more sway than any other when it came to the ship. Jess was already proving to treat it all as much more relaxed than previous experience, inviting a bit of much-needed playfulness to what was normally seen as a very professional and clinical event.

Glancing over at the replicator at Jess' offer, Sydney seemed to ponder for only a moment before turning her attention back to the counselor to answer, "No, thank you. I'm good for now, but I'll let you know if I change my mind." It was a concession she'd not made during her previous interview with the Discovery's XO, but already she was feeling like this was one of those situations where she needed to show a more relaxed stance if she wanted it to go well.

Unsure how to start as she stared at the other woman, Sydney once again slightly rubbed her thighs before asking, "So, how do you do this? Should I just start talking, or"¦was there questions you are supposed to ask?" The Ops Ensign was certainly trying to get things started, but seemingly only to make this evaluation go as quickly as possible, including answering all of the questions in whatever she believed was the correct thing to say to ensure a passing grade from the counselor.

Jess let her eyes fix themself on Sydney's. She nodded and then shrugged slightly. "Yes and no. This isn't a job interview, though I understand why it might feel as if it is. Treat this more as a normal conversation." She could tell the woman felt quite stiff and uncomfortable. "So, tell me what brings someone with a doctorate in computer science and a master's in cybernetics to be an ops officer?" Some of her hair had fallen over her right eye causing her to reach up and brush her hair behind her ear again.

[Sydney Reid]

[USS Discovery-B | Deck 9 | Counselor's Office]

Jess let her eyes fix themself on Sydney's. She nodded and then shrugged slightly. "Yes and no. This isn't a job interview, though I understand why it might feel as if it is. Treat this more as a normal conversation." She could tell the woman felt quite stiff and uncomfortable. "So, tell me what brings someone with a doctorate in computer science and a master's in cybernetics to be an ops officer?" Some of her hair had fallen over her right eye causing her to reach up and brush her hair behind her ear again.

Sydney was overcome with a weird sense of deja uv at both the direction and the question posed to her. While she'd been much more open with the XO, she didn't believe such a rambling answer would serve her well for this"¦'normal conversation'. After giving it the briefest moment of thought, the woman decided to take Jess up on her previous offer. "You know, maybe I will take that coffee." Standing up swiftly from the chair, Sydney glanced to the counselor and flashed an open palm to her, "No need to get up. I'm well-versed in replicator operation.

Stepping over and making a few, quick silent selections using the control panel as opposed to asking the computer, a rather large cup of a blended coffee materialized. Picking it up and moving back over to her chair, Sydney took a sip along the way before taking a seat once again. As opposed to her previous posture, instead of her hands resting on her thighs, they now clutched the tall coffee cup with both hands. Fixing her eyes on the woman across the desk, she lifted the cup to her lips once again, giving the slightly steaming cup a soft blow before taking a small sip.

Relaxing back into her chosen posture, Sydney inhaled and exhaled a deep breath before finally addressing the counselor's question. "The simplest answer is that Daystrom, where I was working at the time, didn't see the value in my continued research into Starfleet's computer security protocols. Starfleet has always been a bit..," her eyes shifted off as she paused in thought, "overconfident in their view of the security of their systems. Daystrom, due to their integration and reliance on Starfleet, was more interested in putting time and resources towards creating new defensive and weapons technology instead of safeguarding the technology we already have. I didn't see a future there that wouldn't involve me having to struggle against a system that didn't seem to believe my work held importance, so I decided to leave the civilian sector to join Starfleet where I knew I would be able to continue my work, even if not in as dedicated of a way, and hopefully one day bring about a new standard to our systems' security to prevent many of the tragedies that have resulted from that hubris."

While that may have answered the counselor's question as to the why of Sydney's decision to join Starfleet, she couldn't be sure the fellow Ensign had gleaned the specifics of her specialties from the rather breif personnel file that was little more than an outline of her life. Reaching up to set her cup of coffee on the edge of the desk, Sydney said simply, "I'm primarily a programmer, with a particular focus toward cryptography." Holding up her hands to show them to Jess, Sydney entered the unique sequence of thumb-to-fingertip touches that activated her ocular implants, changing her brown eyes to an almost illuminated golden color. Lowering her hands to wrap them back around her cup, but not taking it from the desktop, the Ops Officer continued, "My master's is a result of my work on these, in conjunction with a fellow student that was a certified surgeon working towards advancing nanotechnological implants. Tomobiki is the leading university in ocular implants and enhancements, so"¦" Sydney offered a shrug as she pulled her cup off the desk and took another sip, leaving her implants activated while the conversation continued.

Unlike her conversation with Rayek, the Ops Ensign had a feeling that the logical, informational answer wasn't exactly what the counselor was looking for, but it had become the usual answer when asked that inquiry. It was a question she'd received entirely too many times since initially applying to join Starfleet. Apparently, the Fleet wasn't accustomed to such highly-accredited academics choosing such a life of service, making her choice curious, if not suspicious, to many she encountered.

[Jess Willard]

[USS Discovery-B | Deck 9 | Counselor's Office]

Sydney was overcome with a weird sense of deja uv at both the direction and the question posed to her. While she'd been much more open with the XO, she didn't believe such a rambling answer would serve her well for this"¦'normal conversation'. After giving it the briefest moment of thought, the woman decided to take Jess up on her previous offer. "You know, maybe I will take that coffee." Standing up swiftly from the chair, Sydney glanced to the counselor and flashed an open palm to her, "No need to get up. I'm well-versed in replicator operation.

Stepping over and making a few, quick silent selections using the control panel as opposed to asking the computer, a rather large cup of a blended coffee materialized. Picking it up and moving back over to her chair, Sydney took a sip along the way before taking a seat once again. As opposed to her previous posture, instead of her hands resting on her thighs, they now clutched the tall coffee cup with both hands. Fixing her eyes on the woman across the desk, she lifted the cup to her lips once again, giving the slightly steaming cup a soft blow before taking a small sip.

Relaxing back into her chosen posture, Sydney inhaled and exhaled a deep breath before finally addressing the counselor's question. "The simplest answer is that Daystrom, where I was working at the time, didn't see the value in my continued research into Starfleet's computer security protocols. Starfleet has always been a bit..," her eyes shifted off as she paused in thought, "overconfident in their view of the security of their systems. Daystrom, due to their integration and reliance on Starfleet, was more interested in putting time and resources towards creating new defensive and weapons technology instead of safeguarding the technology we already have. I didn't see a future there that wouldn't involve me having to struggle against a system that didn't seem to believe my work held importance, so I decided to leave the civilian sector to join Starfleet where I knew I would be able to continue my work, even if not in as dedicated of a way, and hopefully one day bring about a new standard to our systems' security to prevent many of the tragedies that have resulted from that hubris."

While that may have answered the counselor's question as to the why of Sydney's decision to join Starfleet, she couldn't be sure the fellow Ensign had gleaned the specifics of her specialties from the rather breif personnel file that was little more than an outline of her life. Reaching up to set her cup of coffee on the edge of the desk, Sydney said simply, "I'm primarily a programmer, with a particular focus toward cryptography." Holding up her hands to show them to Jess, Sydney entered the unique sequence of thumb-to-fingertip touches that activated her ocular implants, changing her brown eyes to an almost illuminated golden color. Lowering her hands to wrap them back around her cup, but not taking it from the desktop, the Ops Officer continued, "My master's is a result of my work on these, in conjunction with a fellow student that was a certified surgeon working towards advancing nanotechnological implants. Tomobiki is the leading university in ocular implants and enhancements, so"¦" Sydney offered a shrug as she pulled her cup off the desk and took another sip, leaving her implants activated while the conversation continued.

Unlike her conversation with Rayek, the Ops Ensign had a feeling that the logical, informational answer wasn't exactly what the counselor was looking for, but it had become the usual answer when asked that inquiry. It was a question she'd received entirely too many times since initially applying to join Starfleet. Apparently, the Fleet wasn't accustomed to such highly-accredited academics choosing such a life of service, making her choice curious, if not suspicious, to many she encountered.

Jess listened intently nodding as the fellow officer spoke. She leaned slightly to the left to place her arm on the armrest of her chair. For a moment she let every word the ensign spoke linger in the air around them before finally clearing the air. "I see. It makes sense to leave a system you feel yourself incompatible with." She paused to let that fill the space for a brief moment before she continued.

Willard's eyes never left Reid's. She smiled slightly and then leaned forward intently. "Tell me how it felt to work in that system. I can imagine it was quite frustrating to feel like you were a puzzle piece that didn't fit."

[Sydney Reid]

[USS Discovery-B | Deck 9 | Counselor's Office]

Jess listened intently nodding as the fellow officer spoke. She leaned slightly to the left to place her arm on the armrest of her chair. For a moment she let every word the ensign spoke linger in the air around them before finally clearing the air. "I see. It makes sense to leave a system you feel yourself incompatible with." She paused to let that fill the space for a brief moment before she continued.

Willard's eyes never left Reid's. She smiled slightly and then leaned forward intently. "Tell me how it felt to work in that system. I can imagine it was quite frustrating to feel like you were a puzzle piece that didn't fit."

It wasn't so much the woman's leaning forward that caused the reaction, but the question posed that seemed to push Sydney's shoulders back into the chair in which she was sitting. Her finger tips began to gently strum against the cup being held within them as she gave Jess a slightly suspicious look, letting the question linger in silence for an exceptionally long moment given the directness of the private and uninterrupted conversation taking place. Whether she realized it or not, Jess' metaphor had caused a moment of curiosity in the Operations Officer as she tried to wrap her mind around the abstractness of it.

Humming into her words after a moment of intense thought, "...Umm, I don't know if I'd describe it like that. It was frustrating, yes, but not so much because I didn't 'fit', so to speak. The issues I was addressing, the ones I considered most pressing to both Starfleet and the entirety of the Galaxy as a whole, were treated as if they were incredibly minor, even if they had historically proven to be the cause of millions if not billions of deaths. I found it astonishing that a continuing oversight that had resulted in so much fear and death wasn't treated with the seriousness that I believed it should."

Sydney's demeanor had certainly changed as she spoke. Her suspicion and nervousness as gradually been replaced by an apparent passion, and to some extent, anger that her point of view had been seemingly dismissed so easily. Taking a quick sip of her coffee, which her fingertips had stopped strumming against as she continued to hold it in her lap, she continued, "My decision to leave Daystrom, to leave the program that only I seemed to take any interest in, was because I felt that, at least in Starfleet, they might be able to see the importance of my field of focus, since they were the ones that had so often suffered from the fear such oversight brought upon them. While I do miss certain areas of the work I was doing before, Starfleet has allowed me to not only continue to delve deeper into the issues I am focused on solving but to also expand upon it to include methods and applications I hadn't considered before. They allowed me to open my perspective to include things, such as language, that I hadn't before made the connections between.

"Now, I have a level of autonomy that I didn't truly have before. Before, I had to give regular updates; regular 'proofs' of the work I was doing and how it was improving. Here, no one seems too concerned with what I'm working on or researching as long as my duties are kept in good standing, which isn't actually terribly difficult from my perspective. It's easy to make tools to automate and monitor most of my minor duties for me, allowing me the freedom I didn't have before to focus on finding solutions to the problems I've been identifying for years. I just hope, if I find solutions or methods that fall outside of the usual 'box' of thinking, Starfleet might see value in them, instead of dismissing them without allowing me to show my evidence and proof of functionality." It was then that Sydney gave a slight, dismissive shrug before taking another sip of her coffee, as if she'd already given up on some of the effort needed to fight for her convictions and ideals.

[Jess Willard]

[USS Discovery-B | Deck 9 | Counselor's Office]

It wasn't so much the woman's leaning forward that caused the reaction, but the question posed that seemed to push Sydney's shoulders back into the chair in which she was sitting. Her finger tips began to gently strum against the cup being held within them as she gave Jess a slightly suspicious look, letting the question linger in silence for an exceptionally long moment given the directness of the private and uninterrupted conversation taking place. Whether she realized it or not, Jess' metaphor had caused a moment of curiosity in the Operations Officer as she tried to wrap her mind around the abstractness of it.

Humming into her words after a moment of intense thought, "...Umm, I don't know if I'd describe it like that. It was frustrating, yes, but not so much because I didn't 'fit', so to speak. The issues I was addressing, the ones I considered most pressing to both Starfleet and the entirety of the Galaxy as a whole, were treated as if they were incredibly minor, even if they had historically proven to be the cause of millions if not billions of deaths. I found it astonishing that a continuing oversight that had resulted in so much fear and death wasn't treated with the seriousness that I believed it should."

Sydney's demeanor had certainly changed as she spoke. Her suspicion and nervousness as gradually been replaced by an apparent passion, and to some extent, anger that her point of view had been seemingly dismissed so easily. Taking a quick sip of her coffee, which her fingertips had stopped strumming against as she continued to hold it in her lap, she continued, "My decision to leave Daystrom, to leave the program that only I seemed to take any interest in, was because I felt that, at least in Starfleet, they might be able to see the importance of my field of focus, since they were the ones that had so often suffered from the fear such oversight brought upon them. While I do miss certain areas of the work I was doing before, Starfleet has allowed me to not only continue to delve deeper into the issues I am focused on solving but to also expand upon it to include methods and applications I hadn't considered before. They allowed me to open my perspective to include things, such as language, that I hadn't before made the connections between.

"Now, I have a level of autonomy that I didn't truly have before. Before, I had to give regular updates; regular 'proofs' of the work I was doing and how it was improving. Here, no one seems too concerned with what I'm working on or researching as long as my duties are kept in good standing, which isn't actually terribly difficult from my perspective. It's easy to make tools to automate and monitor most of my minor duties for me, allowing me the freedom I didn't have before to focus on finding solutions to the problems I've been identifying for years. I just hope, if I find solutions or methods that fall outside of the usual 'box' of thinking, Starfleet might see value in them, instead of dismissing them without allowing me to show my evidence and proof of functionality." It was then that Sydney gave a slight, dismissive shrug before taking another sip of her coffee, as if she'd already given up on some of the effort needed to fight for her convictions and ideals.

[Counselor's Office]

Jess relaxed her posture once again as she listened to the woman speak. Then she saw the woman take a sip of replicator coffee and tensed slightly. "Next time we're getting you better coffee. We do the real stuff in this office, not replicator coffee." She said almost absentmindedly. She paused for a moment as she thought about Sydney's words. "Autonomy..." She said out loud as if to let Reid know what she was thinking. "Something I find interesting is that your quest for autonomy brought you to Starfleet, an organization with a rather strict chain of command."

Before going in for the next line of questioning she decided to shift slightly to comment on other things that had been said. She found dancing around in the conversation tended to leave people off guard for when the next questions came, something that usually allowed for much more...honest answers. It also had the added benefit of not giving people time to think on answers, because if they can't tell where you're going with something they never know what question to think on. "I would imagine it would have felt quite frustrating to have concerns feel like they weren't shared to the level you saw them. Especially when you feel like your concerns would save lives and protect people outside the organization you operate inside." Again, it was time to aim straight for a tough question. "How has the adjustment to the rigid command structure affected you?"

[Sydney Reid]

[USS Discovery-B | Deck 9 | Counselor's Office]

Jess relaxed her posture once again as she listened to the woman speak. Then she saw the woman take a sip of replicator coffee and tensed slightly. "Next time we're getting you better coffee. We do the real stuff in this office, not replicator coffee." She said almost absentmindedly. She paused for a moment as she thought about Sydney's words. "Autonomy..." She said out loud as if to let Reid know what she was thinking. "Something I find interesting is that your quest for autonomy brought you to Starfleet, an organization with a rather strict chain of command."

Before going in for the next line of questioning she decided to shift slightly to comment on other things that had been said. She found dancing around in the conversation tended to leave people off guard for when the next questions came, something that usually allowed for much more...honest answers. It also had the added benefit of not giving people time to think on answers, because if they can't tell where you're going with something they never know what question to think on. "I would imagine it would have felt quite frustrating to have concerns feel like they weren't shared to the level you saw them. Especially when you feel like your concerns would save lives and protect people outside the organization you operate inside." Again, it was time to aim straight for a tough question. "How has the adjustment to the rigid command structure affected you?"

There was a dismissive roll of her eyes accompanying a small smirk at the Counsellor's comment about the coffee. Sydney didn't think much of the replicator's product, but she wouldn't turn down the genuine thing if it was offered in the future, which she hoped wouldn't be too soon. The woman's focus on the particular word the cryptologist used was of particular note to Sydney, which only seemed to be countered by the statement Jess made right after, or so the counselor may have believed.

While Sydney could have gone on and on in detail about how her ignored concerns not only was a problem for those beyond Starfleet but also those within it, that wasn't the question posed to her. Even if the short moment of time it had taken the counselor to comment on her reactions and form her inquiry to the computer scientist, the woman had already begun to formulate an answer, convoluted as it may end up, to address the question posed to her.

"While there has certainly been an adjustment period between moving from the civilian sector to that of a more militaristic one, the rigidity of Starfleet: its structure, its protocols, its strict command structure I see as a benefit in the overall to the pursuit of my goals. Starfleet is a system with clear, definable rules and boundaries, like a computer program. To advance in Starfleet is a simple math problem. 'Time plus Proficiency plus Work equals Steady Promotion.' One is rewarded for simply doing their job at a high level consistently.

"In the Civilian Sector, there are a lot more politics at play. You have to prove what you are working on not only has value but also convince others that your work will one day lead to some reward for it, and more often than not, for them; those that permit and fund your research. Even if the Dominion War is long in the rear-view, the incidents on Mars as well as the revelations of the Romulan involvement, numerous new hostile threats that have developed as a reaction to the fracturing of the former Romulan Empire, which had made the UFOP's focus more on protecting their borders as a Military would: through develop of weapons technology, as opposed to the mission Starfleet was originally intended to serve: the exploration of space and the expansion of our collective knowledge.

"Simply put, I came to understand I had no interest in working in an industry that was mercurial by nature, shifting this way and that depending on the desires of those who were only acting out of fear as opposed to logically identifying tangible problems and finding solutions to them. Starfleet's rigid structure, the nature by which one seeks advancement, is governed and set in stone by a definable architecture, much like a computer's framework. In such a rigid structure, it is easier for me to not only focus my talents and desires towards a specific field of advancement, but the nature of Starfleet's promotional structure ensures that, if I continue to prove myself in the way their regulations outline, I will one day find myself in a position to have the influence to make those changes, to bring those changes to fruition not only for the betterment of the Fleet but for the betterment of the Galaxy as a whole.

"Even though you may see my desire for autonomy as in contrast to the rigid structure of Starfleet, I see it as a system in which I can thrive because of that rigidity; because it doesn't require me to campaign for those things that I feel are important if I can prove they are important to the Fleet and have either the rank or recommendations to have my work presented to those that are willing to listen, to see it for what it is.

"In the Civilian Sector, that which I concerned myself with is seen as only a nuisance given Starfleet has managed to overcome and conceal the mistakes and losses that have been made without there being major public incidents until very recently. If someone had been doing the work I am doing twenty years ago, we may not have had an Incident like what happened on Mars. If the Mars Incident hadn't happened, we may have been able to not only save millions, if not billions of Romulans but also bridge the relationship between our peoples in a way unlike any had been able to achieve before, making a more unified galaxy instead of the more fractured one we find ourselves in now.

"The only issue I've found with the strict command structure I've experienced is superiors that lack the extensive knowledge in the specialties I spent most my adult life advancing in, leaving them mostly ignorant to what I try to explain to them. While some may find this frustrating, at least with my current Chief, he's chosen to not interfere as opposed to limiting me, which is certainly to my benefit.

"Those couple of Petty Officers I work with I treat like I did co-workers, not as superior might, even if I forget sometimes that is the position I have been placed in. They've learned this quickly, and, I believe, has come to benefit the overall harmony and efficiency in the lab in which I am primarily assigned. While their reasons for enlisting might not have been the same as why I chose to apply to the Academy and seek a Commission, I'm fairly certain they would speak highly of me, albeit maybe even finding my nature almost unexpectedly relaxed for an Officer.

"As for my fellow officers and superior officers, I try my best to treat them with the respect their rank deserves, but, as a result of my Papa's years of stories, tend to see them more as equals all sharing the pursuit of a collective goal as opposed to a strict hierarchy that must be acknowledged with every breath. Since coming aboard Discovery, I've had both positive experiences of this personal nature, as well as negative experiences. Those that were positive I have found a level of kinship with. Those that were negative I have been able to attribute to the normal Egos you find in those who consider themselves the best at what they do, which is no different from the vast majority of Scientists and Researchers I had experienced in my previous academic career.

"While I may have succeeded a great deal in the Academy, mostly through keeping my head down and focusing on my studies, I know that actually serving aboard a starship as a bonafide officer and specialist is vastly different. My Papa has warned me of such many times since I first considered Starfleet as an alternate path to my ultimate goals. I knew coming in it would be a difficult transition, but I do believe, if I keep at it, it is a much more efficient and clearly defined path to achieve those goals. As with any new system, there are 'growing pains' and unexpected variables, but I have always had a knack for adapting when required, and I fully plan to do the same within Starfleet.

"Honestly, besides a single encounter in which I probably overstepped due to only wanting to keep a situation from becoming far worse for everyone involved than it needed to become; a situation I had come to witness or be part of numerous times in the past in my civilian life, I have only had positive experiences and made far more enriching personal connections than I initially thought I would make. Even if I feel like I'm making mistakes far more often than I like, I'm truly starting to really appreciate the choice I made and am starting to believe that Starfleet was the right choice for me, even if to a third party it may have looked like an unexpected choice."

Sydney knew she had gone on for quite a bit, rambling at times, but still retained a focus and awareness of her words as she tried to give the most complete answer to the counselor's inquiry as she could. It was surely the result of old habits of having to explain a great deal of technical methods and results to those looking to either find fault in them or discredit her or her work in some way. As much as she was a Starfleet Officer now, she still carried a great deal of the civilian researcher she'd previously been within herself and her mannerisms.

Throughout all of it, her focus had been entirely on Jess, as if she'd been standing in front of yet another dissertation defense. Yet, finding herself momentarily satisfied and feeling oddly relieved to have been able to speak at such length in a setting where it didn't seem her work or career was on the line, Sydney had momentarily wondered why she'd never taken her Dad's advice to seek out even occasional therapy before. Even if she didn't want to admit it, it felt as if a great weight had been lifted off her shoulders as she lifted the coffee cup cradled in her hands to take another, much-needed sip.

It was only then that Sydney remember Jess' first comment, causing her to smirk as she lowered the cup to add as an afterthought, "If you are offering rea coffee next time, I may be more inclined to do this more often than just when mandated." While it wasn't an outright admission that she was finding this whole experience positive, it was at least revealing a peek into her shifting opinion on the act.