Out of Proportion - Buehler/Myne

[myne]

[ Ensign Myne | Sickbay | USS Challenger ]

She was dry, clean, and sitting on the biobed wearing not her uniform but a medical gown. Her feet were covered in slippers as she laid on the bed cuddling a plush Alfa 117 canine. Her hair was down and not in the pigtails and she looked... rough. She didn't even turn but just laid there and whispered, "So is my comission stripped..."

[Ian Galloway]

[ Ensign Myne | Sickbay | USS Challenger ]

She was dry, clean, and sitting on the biobed wearing not her uniform but a medical gown. Her feet were covered in slippers as she laid on the bed cuddling a plush Alfa 117 canine. Her hair was down and not in the pigtails and she looked... rough. She didn't even turn but just laid there and whispered, "So is my comission stripped..."

[Sickbay - USS Challenger]

As Jess waited with her young, but not young patient, she smiled when she say Melly awake. She blinked in surprise at the ensign's question.

"Starfleet invests a lot of effort in training crew, they do not like to see that effort and potential go to waste. You've had a set back, they happen. Doctor Buehler will be here shortly and will begin talking to you about what occurred. Once he has an understanding of the reasons behind your distress, you will talk though those causes and, assuming all goes well, you will be fully restored to duty.

"Please put being forced to leave out of your mind. Being fully honest, could it happen? It is in the realm of the possible, but only remotely. Only if Doctor Buehler finds it would be dangerous for your health for you to continue to serve would there be any possibility of you leaving Starfleet. That however, is the worst possible outcome and extremely unlikely."

[myne]

[ Ensign Myne | Sickbay | USS Challenger ]

Myne almost broke down again in relief but she held it back. That would help nothing now but she nodded hearing the advice and calming words of the Doctor. "I royally botched this right up.. I was managing.. I was holding it together. But that one thing. I don't want another slave brand. I don't have enough leg."

She cuddled the plush close and whimpered to it, she had always been told plushies drink tears. She had plenty for this puppy plush.

"I'll... just sit and be a good girl till the Doctor arrives.. Thank you Ma'am.", she said closing her eyes to rest till he arrived.

[Buehler]

[Sickbay]

The moment Evan walked into sickbay, one of the nurses caught his attention. She's over there, she mouthed, before nodding her head in the direction of the biobeds. As he rounded the corner, he was greeted by the sight of Myne in a medical gown and a wave of sorrow hit him. Sometimes he felt like having adhd was the closest a human could get to being a betazoid without actually being betazoid.

Why was she in a medical gown? Had she gotten hurt? "Thank you for waiting with her, Lieutenant," he said to the ship counselor, before turning to Myne. He crouched so that his eyes were level with hers, trying to convey an ocean of compassion without saying a word. "Are you hurt? Would you like a hug? Please tell me how I can help, and we will work together to get you feeling right as rain again."

[myne]

[Sickbay]

The moment Evan walked into sickbay, one of the nurses caught his attention. She's over there, she mouthed, before nodding her head in the direction of the biobeds. As he rounded the corner, he was greeted by the sight of Myne in a medical gown and a wave of sorrow hit him. Sometimes he felt like having adhd was the closest a human could get to being a betazoid without actually being betazoid.

Why was she in a medical gown? Had she gotten hurt? "Thank you for waiting with her, Lieutenant," he said to the ship counselor, before turning to Myne. He crouched so that his eyes were level with hers, trying to convey an ocean of compassion without saying a word. "Are you hurt? Would you like a hug? Please tell me how I can help, and we will work together to get you feeling right as rain again."

[ Ensign Myne | Sickbay | USS Challenger ]

Melly slowly turned to look to the Doctor. The impish mischeviousness that the Doctor saw before was not there. Her hair was not in the pigtails was drapped down and a outright mess. It was fluffed a bit and looked dishevled. She then turned so she was sitting with her feet dangling before him. She looked into his eyes and her bright green ones were red from crying as the side of her face was red as well from hitting herself. She looked as if someone putting a tray down too hard would make her jump out of her skin.

Her feet were covered with slippers but it was obvious her toes were curling in them in terror. She then lifted the gown before him showing she was wearing nappies at this time do to the panics. She then dropped the gown back down as her shoulders slumped and her palms moved to cover her eyes. It was not long before the hands curled into fists and she looked to him scared.

"I'm afraid and I don't know how to stop... In the mission I was to play a child hostage which... I was fine with... the man we were going to go to would brand.. by cutting designs into people... all the memories came back and I angered my room mate Lieutenant Kyan.. I am a failure.", she sighed.

The fists curled tighter and she began hitting herself in the face over and over and over and over, "Bad dumb stupid bad..."

[Buehler]

[Sickbay]

His heart sank deeper and deeper the more he looked. Her hair hung in loose straggles, slippers dangled from her feet, and absolute despair clung to her face. Myne lifted the gown a little to reveal the "nappies". As her hands clenched into fists, Evan wrapped his arms around her. "We can't beat ourselves up for things outside of out control," he told her.

"What you're feeling is completely valid. It is ok to have intense emotions and it is better to recognize them them instead of trying to bottle them up. If you don't let them flow they might explode like a volcano. I may not be an actual therapist, but I have spent enough working with them to recognize ptsd. It takes time to overcome, but with a little help, it is possible."

Evan sighed, hugging her a little tighter for a brief moment before letting go. "When my wife was a newly minted Ensign like you, she was kidnapped on a station and held in the Jeffries tubes. Luckily the only injury she got was a broken ankle, but to this day she hates tight spaces. But her anxiety got better over time, and she knows I would never let anything bad happen to her. The captain would never let you come to harm. We look out for each other. You are safe now."

[myne]

[ Ensign Myne | Sickway | USS Challenger ]

Myne didn't expect the hug. She was a hugger but to get one back? It felt... magical. She was so happy. She found a person to help her and to help her to get over the pain and worry and fear that so plagued her.

The red alert klaxon sounded without warning.
"Red Alert. Battlestations. This is only a drill. All hands to Battlestations."

The Doctor had been holding her, talking to her, keeping her arms down so she would not harm herself. Then the alert. It didn't matter it was a drill, it mattered the sound. It normally would not worry her or rattle her. But she was so on edge that any sharp noise even a tray being placed down too loudly would have done it.

So she lept forward in his arms, her small form into his as she pressed her face to his chest sobbing mournfully and rewetting herself.

This was not a simple talking to and the officer was better. She needed help, and she would recover but it was a road not a driveway. She would need time and understanding. She looked up to him as she realized she had lept and had wet herself again... and she just looked up wordless with her mouth open for an entire minute before she began.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It is sorry. It it sorry. It is sorry.", she looked beggingly up hoping to not be punished.

[Buehler]

[Sickbay]

Evan jerked at the sudden red alert. To the devil with all that racket. One of these days, someone was going to die of a heart attack because of the alarmingly loud klaxon that accompanied the flashing red light. Distracted by the thought, he was surprised to find his arms full. He looked down to see Myne's equally perplexed expression that quickly turned into a sobbed apology.

"It is perfectly ok," Evan replied, giving her a quick squeeze before setting her back on the bed. "There is no need to apologize for something you can't control. This is just a medical uniform; it can be washed. And don't forget, I have three Littles of my own. I have been covered by indescribable liquids far more gross," he added with a laugh.

Evan crouched back down to be at her eye level. "I'm gonna just step aside for like five seconds to send the captain a quick update. It'll probably be a good idea for you to spend a few days in Sickbay to give your mind and body time to settle. I'll be right back.

Satisfied that his patient was physically safe for the moment, Evan stepped away to send the following:

Captain, an update on Ensign Myne. I recommend a standard 72 hour psychiatric hold, bit I see no reason she shouldn't be able to bounce back from this.

Lieutenant Evan Buehler, Ship doctor

[myne]

[Captain Ian Galloway | Bridge | USS Challenger]

Ian felt a pang of sympathy for the young, not young ensign. He typed a quick reply.

"Understood. Proceed in whatever manner you deep necessary. However, it is advised that your patient be referred to as Ensign Melly Pwllgwyngyll goin' forward."

[Ensign Myne | Sickbay | USS Challenger]

She was settled in as a Human female medical crewman helped change her.

It was embarrassing and shameful. Something that tore her up inside. But at the same time it gave her a feeling of comfort.

Back on Miri the circle of Mommies would rock paper scissors who had to do that to the few babies born. But they did and there was no kind feelings she would remember. Almost just 'obligation' for the lack of a better term.

This person could be seen as the same, a obligation.. but they were kind and it brought a smile to her shaking face.

The woman seemed experienced in the act as the first thing was to offer the stuffed canine up to Melly to ask her to hold. This act brought a warming sense of calm then the quick wham and done. Almost like a magician removing a tablecloth without harming the dishes atop.

A warm blanket, it was so warm and toasty as if just taken out of the warmer caused her shivering to stop as the crew woman tucked Myne in and went about her duties. She seemed 'calmer' now and less wirey for when the doctor would return.

[Buehler]

[Bridge - USS Challenger]

Ian felt a pang of sympathy for the young, not young ensign. He typed a quick reply.

"Understood. Proceed in whatever manner you deem necessary. However, it is advised that your patient be referred to as Ensign Melly Pwllgwyngyll goin' forward."

Finished with his review of the drill data. He tapped his combadge.

"Galloway ta Said. How are your simulations goin'."

[Sickbay]

Evan was grateful for a commanding officer who was willing to accommodate his style of communication. He loathed using his comm badge, feeling like he had to fight to catch every word that came through and still lose half of it in the process. Text based was far more efficient and allowed him to catch more of the nuance, like the fact that Myne should be called Melly? Evan shrugged before returning to his patient. It would at least be a good seque to continue their conversation.

He smiled to see Myne wrapped in a warm blanket. "Did you that wrapping yourself in a blanket like that helps produce more of the happy chemicals in your brain?" he asked. "Especially weighted blankets, which really lean into 'deep pressure stimulation'." The physics of medicine were exciting, he thought.

"I do have a question, if you feel up to it," Evan added. "Can you tell me about the name Melly?"

[myne]

[Sickbay]

Evan was grateful for a commanding officer who was willing to accommodate his style of communication. He loathed using his comm badge, feeling like he had to fight to catch every word that came through and still lose half of it in the process. Text based was far more efficient and allowed him to catch more of the nuance, like the fact that Myne should be called Melly? Evan shrugged before returning to his patient. It would at least be a good seque to continue their conversation.

He smiled to see Myne wrapped in a warm blanket. "Did you that wrapping yourself in a blanket like that helps produce more of the happy chemicals in your brain?" he asked. "Especially weighted blankets, which really lean into 'deep pressure stimulation'." The physics of medicine were exciting, he thought.

"I do have a question, if you feel up to it," Evan added. "Can you tell me about the name Melly?"

[Ensign Myne | Sickbay | USS Challenger]

The blanket made her feel so wonderful, "A.. weighted blanket? I do not understand. If it feels nicer that sounds good but I feel so wonderful from the blanket." She wasn't really lying.. she did feel safe from the blanket but the question stopped her.

Taking a deep breath she thought and repeated what she said earlier to Kyan, "My name is Melly Pwllgwyngyll. The man in Quarks who enslaved me said it is too hard to spell. So he named me Myne. So i'm Myne. Every one of the bad people liked it. So i'm Myne. Not Melly... Myne. Real people have full names. I'm Myne.. because the slavers said it was.."

She began shaking but luckily she didn't have any left in her so the Doctor was safe. She instead was having a mild panic. "I'm not Melly.. i'm Myne."

[Buehler]

[Sickbay]

Sometimes Evan forgot that what was normal for him wasn't necessarily normal for everyone else. Like his brain constantly spinning a million miles an hour. "Weighted blankets have sand in them to make them heavier," he explained. "I might just prescribe you one."

Myne's reaction to the name caught him completely off guard. So it was a before name, but not one that had a bad meaning for her. "You're not a slave anymore," he reminded her, hugging her again. He could feel her shaking, like it was trying to reject something that was a part of her.

"There are plenty of real people that only have one name, like the Vulcans. My wife has two names, but that's because her father was human. And when we got married, she decided not to take my name." Evan paused, trying to hold onto his train of thought while coaching it in the right direction.  "My point is, you can choose what name you want to be called by. I will keep calling you Myne if you want, but I won't like it. But I understand that it can be hard to let go of bad things because they get so engrained."

Another idea suddenly popped into his head. "So I know you probably want your own kids some day. But in the mean time, maybe you'd like to be an aunt to my kids. I know the kids would love you and I'm sure my wife would be on board with it."

[myne]

[ Ensign Myne | Sickbay | USS Challenger ]

"I would be happy to try the blanket. I used to sleep inside a Choraii for a decade. They are a breathable liquid inside. It was so warm and it felt like this blanket but heavier. I would love to try a weighted one. It might remind me of them..", Myne smiled thinking of the singing she would hear inside.

Melting into the Doctors hug.. she was a hugger herself and desperately needed hugs to survive one owner told her. "I... will be called whatever you wish to call me. If your not happy saying Myne... I will respond to Melly. Kyan, my room mate says he will only call me Melly now. So please whatever you want to call me."

"You don't know me Doctor? I would love the chance but I don't know what a stable good family is... I sometimes lay on the floor of my quarters in my pillow fort and imagine I had a Daddy telling me I was good and having dinner and the other things in the holovids that happen? But instead I sleep on the floor, all safe in my pillow fort, and I eat only slave Nutri-Goop. Slaves don't get families. They get owners. Till there not wanted then they are sold.", the shaking started more in ernest as tears dripped from her eyes onto the shoulder of the Doctor.

Seeing what she did she reached up and slapped herself with a firm loud smack, "Bad. This one is sorry."

Rather than try to verbalize the name that only had a single vowel, Lahr simple messaged her.

To: Ensign Melly Pwllgwngyll
From: CPO ShranLahr ch'Verret

Hey MP,
I'm on break in the Deck 16 Crew Lounge. If you feel like some company, join me.... or I could go to you if you aren't feeling like too much company.

Then the message came threw. As her padd she had on the table started pinging.

"Doctor? Could you look please? If that is okay? I don't know what a 72 hour entails so I don't know if I can answer?", Melly whimpered to the Doctor.

[Buehler]

[ Ensign Myne | Sickbay | USS Challenger ]

"I would be happy to try the blanket. I used to sleep inside a Choraii for a decade. They are a breathable liquid inside. It was so warm and it felt like this blanket but heavier. I would love to try a weighted one. It might remind me of them..", Myne smiled thinking of the singing she would hear inside.

Melting into the Doctors hug.. she was a hugger herself and desperately needed hugs to survive one owner told her. "I... will be called whatever you wish to call me. If your not happy saying Myne... I will respond to Melly. Kyan, my room mate says he will only call me Melly now. So please whatever you want to call me."

"You don't know me Doctor? I would love the chance but I don't know what a stable good family is... I sometimes lay on the floor of my quarters in my pillow fort and imagine I had a Daddy telling me I was good and having dinner and the other things in the holovids that happen? But instead I sleep on the floor, all safe in my pillow fort, and I eat only slave Nutri-Goop. Slaves don't get families. They get owners. Till there not wanted then they are sold.", the shaking started more in ernest as tears dripped from her eyes onto the shoulder of the Doctor.

Seeing what she did she reached up and slapped herself with a firm loud smack, "Bad. This one is sorry."

[Sickbay]

Like with many other problems in life, the simplest solution was usually the best. Evan knew there was a name for this phenomenon, but it was at the tip of his tongue. The point was, hugs were pure magic in a way that even the best meds could never be.

"Well, Miss Melly," he said with a smile, "consider yourself part of the Buehler family if you want. We aren't perfect, but we're happy and grateful for what we have. You're not a slave anymore. You get to choose your family now." He was surprised she only hit herself once this time. Progress?

Then the message came threw. As her padd she had on the table started pinging.

Rather than try to verbalize the name that only had a single vowel, Lahr simple messaged her.

To: Ensign Melly Pwllgwngyll
From: CPO ShranLahr ch'Verret

Hey MP,
I'm on break in the Deck 16 Crew Lounge. If you feel like some company, join me.... or I could go to you if you aren't feeling like too much company.

"Doctor? Could you look please? If that is okay? I don't know what a 72 hour entails so I don't know if I can answer?", Melly whimpered to the Doctor.[/b]

Evan gently took the padd from her, quickly skimming through the message. How serendipitous, he thought. He typed a quick reply.

Heyo, Lahr. This is Buehler. Melly is under a 72 hour psychiatric hold, but you're more than welcome to visit. I'm sure she'd love that.

He handed the padd back to Melly. "You're more than welcome to use the padd, provided you don't hit yourself with it... but it looks like Lahr might pop in."

[ShranLahr ch'Verret]

CPO ShranLahr ch'Verret
[USS Challenger - Deck 16 - Crew Lounge >>> Deck 7 - Sickbay]

[Sickbay]

Like with many other problems in life, the simplest solution was usually the best. Evan knew there was a name for this phenomenon, but it was at the tip of his tongue. The point was, hugs were pure magic in a way that even the best meds could never be.

"Well, Miss Melly," he said with a smile, "consider yourself part of the Buehler family if you want. We aren't perfect, but we're happy and grateful for what we have. You're not a slave anymore. You get to choose your family now." He was surprised she only hit herself once this time. Progress?

"Doctor? Could you look please? If that is okay? I don't know what a 72 hour entails so I don't know if I can answer?", Melly whimpered to the Doctor.[/b]

Evan gently took the padd from her, quickly skimming through the message. How serendipitous, he thought. He typed a quick reply.

Heyo, Lahr. This is Buehler. Melly is under a 72 hour psychiatric hold, but you're more than welcome to visit. I'm sure she'd love that.

He handed the padd back to Melly. "You're more than welcome to use the padd, provided you don't hit yourself with it... but it looks like Lahr might pop in."

The response back from his message to Melly wasn't at all what he'd expected. Under 72 hour psychiatric hold? Even with all the outrageous stunts he's pulled over the years - like manually activating an explosive trapped door, or working on a live torpedo on a count down to denotation -  he'd never been brought in for hold.  Hell, it wasn't until Chloe ratted him out to the doctors about his sleeplessness and night terrors that they even considered he might need counseling to deal with some of these experiences.

It spoke volumes to Lahr about what the Only had been through that she was put on the 72 hour hold.  Reading the doc's comment that he was welcome to visit and that she'd love it, helped the Andorian put aside his own aversion to counseling sessions.  For the Only, he'd risk it.

Lahr packed up his tray, deposited it in the recycler, put in a new order to go and then headed via the turbolift up to Deck 7, where he headed to Sickbay and from there got directions to Ensign Pwllgwyngyll's bed which was in a room just off of the main treatment area - in sight of the nurse's desk but with some privacy.

The Andorian was glad that Chloe was either not on shift or busy doing something else.  As he approached the child-like Only, he was once more astounded how much her reddish-orange hair reminded him of Ruth.  She could easily be mistaken for Ruth's daughter - if Ruth had a daughter.

"Heya Doc. Got your message.  Thought I'd take you up on the offer to visit."

Lahr moved nearer the blanket bundled Only.  "Heya M.  How ya  holding up?  You getting tired of hospital food yet?" he questioned with a knowing grin, then held out the covered tray he had in hand. "I snuck you in a piece of chocolate cake and a bowl of vanilla icecream."

Cake and ice cream were comfort foods according to a number of sources.  He hoped that was the case with Melly/Myne.